A few more lingo losers

When young Malaysians go abroad to seek knowledge, they are often very enthusiastic. They brave themselves to finally practise the language they have so long learnt: the English language. Mr. D and I were watching TV together tonight and we began retelling the hilarious stories of our friends' first-time incidents in the UK. One is about dear Meor , Mr. D's friend while the other is regarding my friend, Amin (names obviously changed). Here goes:

Story 1
Setting: at the counter in the bank. Meor is withdrawing some cash.

Teller: How would you like your money?
Meor: Yes, I like my money very much.

*I hope I don't need to explain what the expected response should be.

Story 2
Setting: at the post office.

Amin: Can I have some stamps please?
Attendant: Where to?
Amin: Edinburgh
Attendant: First class or second class?
Amin: Third class!

** Within the UK, you have the option of buying first class OR second class stamps. First class costs a few pennies more but should arrive the destination the following day. While being cheaper, second class would get second class treatment, probably a day or two later. The Royal Mail DOES NOT have third class mails.

So, again I plead, PLEAAAASSSSEEE ask if you're ever in doubt.

something's wrong here...

Is there an earthquake somewhere? Was there a tsunami wave last night? Did it snow while I was asleep? Did I only dream i wrote an entry on Art last night? I know I wrote something and hit the PUBLISH button once I had finished. And I remember seeing the screen displaying something about my entry being published.....

Tsk! Tsk! Tsk! Never mind, let bygones be bygones. Ha! Ha! Ha! This reminds me of a story someone related to me FIRST hand. It's about the saying LET BYGONES BE BYGONES. Let me try to relate to you what it was(names are changed to protect the identity of the idividuals).

Setting: a lazy afternoon in the office. Siti was reading an English novel.

Siti: Eh, Lan, "let bygones be bygones" tu amende yek?
Lan: Oooooh, tu! Alah, bygone! Spray nyamuk tu... Ha, spray bygone tu guna kasi hilang semua la.. kasi mati semua
Siti: Oh, ye ke? Ler..

******
Did the blind lead the blind? I must however say that in context, the explanation was not too misleading. It had a hint of things vanishing or going away. Perhaps, Siti should have just went on reading without seeking advice from the blind!

Another scenario with so-called language experts.
Setting: In the car, on the motorway to London. A sign says: Cat's eyes ahead.

Che Mi: Cat's eye tu apa, ya?
Mat Terer: Oh, tu ada kucing kat depan. Nanti boleh nampak mata kucing je bila lalu kat sana.
Che Mi: Ye ke? (surprised) Macamana boleh ada kucing kat kawasan ni?
Mat Terer: Sini memang kawasan banyak kucing la. Itu sebab dia letak warning kat situ. Takut kita langgar kucing tu.

What the ......????

My conclusion for the day is, if you don't know, never be shy to admit it. Just say, "I'm sorry, I have no idea. Perhaps it means ......". Then, even if it were wrong, it won't be too bad. You were brave enough to admit that you didn't know what it means. Hey, even the other person didn't know!!! On the other hand, if your guess is correct or close to the correct answer, you've proven that you are quite a wise chap after all.

Which also reminds me of a story forwaded in one of my mailboxes some time ago regarding the issue of farting in different societies.

The British say "Pardon Me".
The Americans say "Excuse Me".
The Malay say "Not me, not me".

True? Pause and reflect. There has been a few incidents among close ones proving the truth of the story.

the teddy

Yup, it's the Children In Need day - where the whole nation tries to raise money to help the children in difficulty - abused, disabled, ill, unfortunate in any way. Schools take part by organising all sorts of events. Some have raffles, some have shows, while some others have activities like face-painting. It's a good idea, really. The whole nation is at least at one for a goal: to earn as much as possible for charity. The money is really for the younger generation. For example, the money can be contributed to help a local community dance centre run dancing classes simply to keep the children off the streets.

On a slightly different note, I must comment on the service offered to the British community. There's a library run by the City Council just across the road (well, okay - a bit down the road after crossing at the traffic lights). Physically - it isn't huge. But the facilities are of quality! There are about 20 computers with Internet connection, selection of fiction and non-fiction books (for adults and children), videos, DVDs, CDs, books with audio, printing facilities (black and white printer, coloured printer, photocopying) and other reading materials. What amazed me was that about 40% of the materials were in another language, Urdhu/Tamil or anything similar to that. This was simply because the library is set in an Asian area, thus they try their best to help serve the community there! Within the hour I usually spend there, I'd see young and old people using the facility. People come in to read the newspaper, to check their e-mails, surf the net, return books and of course, getting other books to bury themselves in.

It amazes me how much they are concerned about their community. I've seen a young boy of 9 or 10 coming in and downloading songs from the internet into his MP3. This is what we call world-class facilities and real literacy. The books are of a variety and recent! Not to mention, very colourful, interesting and simple. Why can't it work in good ol' Malaysia? I've worked with children, teenagers, young adults and just found it very difficult to get them involved in reading. When I was teaching in a secondary school, I tried several things. Reading for pleasure, Joke Corner, A story a day (mind you, short stories they were!), Read and Recite, storytelling, story dramatising, etc..etc.. It worked to an extent but I didn't see them reading the way I was hoping they would. There was a Reading programme before where a basket was left in the school canteen for the children to pick whilst doing nothing. Result? Didn't work. Why? The books were NOT interesting!

pause to reflect for the day:

• are we giving as much as we can/should?
• why can't we do it as well as others?
• move towards positivism - we can, we will and we have!!!

My son once asked me after a month in Britain:

Mom, we can't eat non-halal food because it'll be in our blood and affect our
daily acts, right? Then, does it mean that all the non-muslims do are
bad? How come there are some who are actually not naughty or bad?

I explained that not all who are non-muslims are bad. They sometimes are much nicer than muslims and portray angelic acts. However, they're faith(iman) isn't there that everything good they do won't mean anything. No pahala, no point. It all boils down to the niat and the faith.

So, moving back to the points to ponder I've listed above, we take a little and we throw a little.

Wallahu'alam