Thursday, March 06, 2008

Lessons of Life - Part Four: Don't be Sad

The title of this entry is inspired by the book by 'Aaidh ibn Abdullah al-Qarni and also a blog I stumbled on, also inspired by the book.

There are moments that I catch myself falling into a pit of sadness - deep and dark. In the pit, I often feel lost and miserable, alone and searching. Whether it is linked to the departure of my late husband, or of other worries, it's not very clear... Perhaps a combination of the two results in something so devastating.

What does sad mean? Words associated with sad are:

bereaved, bitter, blue, cheerless, dejected, depressed, desolate, despairing, despondent, disconsolate, dismal, distressed, doleful, down, forlorn, gloomy, glum, grief-stricken, heartbroken, heavy-hearted, low, lugubrious, melancholy, miserable, morbid, morose, mournful, pensive, pessimistic, regrettable, sombre, sorry, sorrowful, troubled, unhappy, wistful, woebegone.

Then of course there's also SAD, an acronym for Seasonal Affective Disorder. It often strikes those living in a country where there are changes in season and typically occurs in winter, whereby the days grow shorter - less light, lower temperature. Affected by this gloominess (especially in the UK), a person attacked with SAD will become depressed, having normally experiencing excessive eating and sleeping resulting the most obvious: weight gain. So, SAD really is synonym to sad. Interesting.

Some people feel sad when they are weighed down by something in the past or present time, while others feel sad when anxious of their future. Regardless of what the source of your sadness may be, the idea is to not let it get to you. Reach out of the pit and do fill the heart with all of the opposite: feeling of gladness (syukr), joy, optimism and carefree. 'Aaidh Abdullah al-Qarni (2003)suggests keeping oneself active doing good deeds because "idleness is destructive". Hence, I'd say get up and indulge in activities such as reading, writing (blogs included!), working, shopping (yes, ladies...), cooking, baking, cleaning, gardening, sewing, playing any form of games (Scrabulous maybe?), drawing, painting, visiting and exercising (most definitely).

Even though I may not have dealt with my own sadness well enough, I am grateful to wonderful friends who kept me sane when I wasn't so. But at the end of the day, everything else depended on your own will to choose the bright or gloomy side. Only faith in the Almighty kept me on and this verse from the Quran (12: 87) exemplifies it best:
"And never give up hope of Allah's Mercy.
Certainly no one despairs of Allah's Mercy, except the people who
Bobby Mcferrin's song, Don't worry, be Happy, immediately came to mind as I'm writing this. So, I'm putting up the lyrics here so that you can tune in to it. Hopefully, it will put a smile on your face and chase the sadness away. I know it did mine!
Here is a little song I wrote
You might want to sing it note for note
Don't worry be happy
In every life we have some trouble
When you worry you make it double
Don't worry, be happy......
Ain't got no place to lay your head
Somebody came and took your bed
Don't worry, be happy
The land lord say your rent is late
He may have to litigate
Don't worry, be happy
Look at me I am happy
Don't worry, be happy
Here I give you my phone number
When you worry call me I make you happy
Don't worry, be happy
Ain't got no cash, ain't got no style
Ain't got no girl to make you smile
But don't worry be happy
Cause when you worry
Your face will frown
And that will bring everybody down
So don't worry, be happy (now).....
There is this little song I wrote
I hope you learn it note for note
Like good little children
Don't worry, be happy
Listen to what I say
In your life expect some trouble
But when you worry
You make it double
Don't worry, be happy......
Don't worry don't do it, be happy
Put a smile on your face
Don't bring everybody down like this
Don't worry, it will soon past
Whatever it is
Don't worry, be happy


myheartbleeds said...

I love the book -- my copy was given to me by my neighbour shortly after I became a widow. It is my regular read before going to bed.

I have bookmarked page 34 on my copy's edition:

"Sesiapa yang Kuambil orang yang dicintainya di dunia tetap mengharap redha(Ku), nescaya Aku akan akan menggantinya dengan syurga" (Hadith Nabi)

cikMilah said...

kebetulan juga, saya sedang ulangbaca buku ini - terjemahan ke BM "Jangan Bersedih, Jadilah Wanita yang Paling Bahagia, penterjemah Muhammad Huzaifah.
Antara yang lekat pada ingatan saya " Wanita yang agung mampu manhubah kepedihan bencana menjdsi syurga".

Salam dan doa.

anggerik merah said...

Dear D,

love this song as it keep me smiling...and another one is ONE MOMENT IN TIME..

Remind me to read the book don't be sad again..

Umi Kalthum Ngah said...

Assalamualaikum warahmatullah,

Dearest D,

How is it that you I feel at the same time? Hmm..

I have just made a new entry...

The road towards peace...especially in our hearts..

As you said, Wise men (or women for that matter), think alike! hi! hi!

May Allah bless you...and the children too..Amin.


F Manchester said...

I can recognise one smile!!! I see Blue Wonder there!!

Cleaning the house always works for me when I'm feeling a bit down. Puas hati tengok rumah berkilat then you put a vase of fresh flowers by the window cill, that I picked up from tesco £1.99 nye. Vualah!! It just picks me up..

Then there's always chocolate...

Restless said...

I tak nampak tanda lahir I, meaning I'm safe!!!

Minci said...

wow.. rajinnya mengedit senyum2 orang

bluewonder said...

bluewonder here...f from manchester said I'm in the come tuan punya badan pun tak recognise her angelina jolie lips..hahahahhhh

F Manchester said...

Ayo blue wonder.... 4 across and 5th down. Vualah!!! Angelina Jooling!

zulkapli said...

I think I saw mine. Betul tak?