Lessons of Life: Part Three - Life and Death

The goal of all life is death ~ Sigmund Freud

When a life ends, the reaction is often devastating. People sob and cry, and suddenly everyone becomes so religious. This is merely my observation. When I was younger, I recall thinking how pretentious people were with death - only mourning, grieving and turning to God when death comes, and then to move on without much thought of the lessons learnt through it. After decades, my views have somewhat altered, though in reality, I do ponder how easily one can forget about the reminder sent by Him.

Thinking about death is actually in line with the teachings of Islam as it prepares each individual for the day after. After all, a lifetime on earth can never compare to life in the hereafter which is eternal! The Quran teaches us to believe that the present life is a trial in preparation for the next realm of existence.

"O my People! This life of the present is nothing but (temporary) convenience. It is the Hereafter that is the Home that will last. " Surah Al Mu'min -The Believer: (40 39)

Death, therefore, should always be in everyone's minds to the extent that each think more of their deathbeds and work on the preparations. It should serve as enough reminder for each individual to strive to be a better person each day. Hence, since our own death has not yet arrived (we are still breathing and well), life should be lived to the fullest.

I recall reading a story (or hadeeth) regarding a man who withdrew himself from the world after the death of his wife. He had felt that his world was closing on him upon the demise of his soul mate. This concerned many, including one woman who later asked to meet this miserable man in person. She insisted that he met her so that she could ask him of his opinion on a problem she had. When he finally agreed to see her, she told him her story.

She had borrowed a piece of jewellery from her neighbour, and had been keeping and using it for a long time. After a while, the neighbour came to ask it back but she wasn't sure whether she should return it. Hearing this, the man advised the woman to return the jewellery to them (the owners), since it had been lent out to her for such a long time.

The woman was obviously sad to part with the jewellery. Nonetheless, she then thanked the man and said, 'May Allah have mercy on you. Do you then grieve over what Allah has lent you and then taken from you, when He has a greater right to it than you?' The man soon realised the situation he was in, and believed that Allah was helping him out through the woman. That is probably why (as mentioned in passing before) the Almighty has given clear guidelines regarding the period of grieve for each person.

Thus, my aim in life is to use change to improve. The deaths in my family, including my dearest late husband, has taught me to:

• live and love like today is your last - do more good deeds and avoid the wrong for we never know whether we'd have time to repent later, and cherish the moments with those who mean the world to you...
  As quoted by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross:
  It is only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up that we will begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it were the only one we had.

• always look ahead; the past should be reflected upon to make you better
  Quoting Charles Darwin: It is not the strongest of the species that survive, nor the most intelligent, but the one most responsive to change.

So which do you think more of - life or death? Pause and reflect please...