A love story thirteen years ago...

I don't remember the exact date, but I first knew the late Mr D some time thirteen years ago, in 1994. I think the courting and wooing period was stretched quite a bit because yours truly is not good in establishing relationships. I had never been in a relationship before and the only explanation to it is that I'm a big coward. Of course, the idea of having a boyfriend is far-fetching, but whenever a friend approaches, I'd usually put on my running shoes and flee!!!

So, when Mr D approached me, he made his intentions clear: to start a relationship that will hopefully end in marriage. He was persistent and adamant, and somehow, he managed to capture my heart. If I recall correctly, the late Mr D 'found' me when he went to Scotland during his first skiing trip. His friend A knew my friend, W, thus they went to her house. Somehow, he knew that I was in the UK (I was a junior in his secondary school), so he asked the girls if they knew me. He politely asked to look at a picture of me - which my friends kindly obliged - cheeky girls! I still remember the picture they showed him: one of the pictures taken at one of the Malaysian Nights in England (probably Kent). He even asked them for my telephone number, but only got the courage to call after a few weeks later. And that was how it started.

When we went home during the first summer holidays in 1994, he asked whether he could meet me (I had not met him in person yet). I told him, if he wanted to, he'd have to come to my house. And so he came, to meet my dad, who interrogated him like mad - poor fellow! Well, the experience did not deter him and he was even more confident than ever!

Unfortunately, the chicken in me was still there, and after we went back to the UK, I told him that I wanted to review matters. Give me some time... things were moving too fast and I needed some space. Gutted, he fled for a vacation to Europe! Gosh, how cruel was I?

However, as things were meant to be, the relationship bloomed and blossomed. Everyday, we'd write to each other - remember, via snail-mail! Well, at least in the UK you have the First Class Mail, which meant that your mail will be delivered the next day. Oh, I was in Scotland, by the way, and he was in the southern tip of England. It was a long-distance relationship but it worked for us. I don't recall what we wrote about, but the piles of letters are still kept safely in boxes back in my home in PJ. At that time, when internet wasn't as it is today, our modes of communication were only via ordinary mail and on weekends, the telephone. Yeah, the mobile phone was unheard of!

We were then engaged during the summer of 1995 and wed after our graduations in 1996. And after that, we never turned back. Well, whenever we did, it was only to reminisce the wonderful days of yesteryears...

With Mr D, all our dreams were made possible for he was a man who took risks. He planned vacations for us, and I'd often be the one hesitant and full of doubts - oh, the kids are still small, or, do we have the budget?, or, is that the best location?, etc... That's the very rational and level-headed me talking. But as I look back now, I know I have no regrets. On the contrary, I regretted being so cautious and careful.

Imagine, he dragged us all for a holiday in Hong Kong back in 2003 (after SARS), when I had just finished my 40 days' confinement. I remember walking down the lanes in Mongkok and the vendors would laugh and call each other to look at us, with our trail of children! Little D would be in a carrier in my arms, and the twins and princess, all in a row. You see, my boys are rather small in size, but my princess is tall for her age. Hence, when together, they look very much the same age! No, no, they're not triplets!! And, yes, they're all mine!

Then, there were those adventurous trips to Taman Negara (click here for post written in the past), Langkawi (where we ended investing some of our money), the east coast, the neighbouring country in the north, Thailand, and also to the land of the Pharaohs. I think we spent quite a portion of our salaries on holidays together, and those were wonderful moments I now cherish. Jet-skiing in the sea, walking along the beach during sunset, building castles in the cold mediterranean sand, snorkelling in the clear ocean, and experimenting delicious dishes in foreign lands...

The late Mr D was a man who never tired to make us happy. He believed that everything was possible. He knew that life should be enjoyed with those we love, and that was exactly what he did. He never wasted any of his time, cherishing every single moment he had with us.

The past year was the most wonderful year we had spent together - without any boundaries, and without any limits. He rushed home to spend his quality time with the kids, performing the jamaah prayers together, and teaching the kids all sorts of tricks up his sleeves. For that, I thank the Almighty, for perfecting our family...

In the last few weeks I spent with him, the amount of love he felt for me touched me deep within. He had only wanted to eat when I fed him; an act I felt most honoured in doing. Eleven years of marriage, and it was all filled with utmost satisfaction. He had promised me two things in the beginning: to gradually add on to our religious deeds together, and to stay deeply in love till the end of our lives. And Alhamdulillah, he kept to his words...

So, even though there will no more be Pizza Lie..., no more Tony Buzan memory moments, and no more magic tricks from their great daddy, we will definitely keep those memories in mind for those were the things that make us the people we are today. It all started with love, and the love will be kept alive in our minds.

Upon reflection, I realise that one main mistake I had allowed myself to make when I married the late Mr D eleven years ago, was to believe that he was all mine. For 24 years, I had lived without really having someone who belonged to me. I had mom, but she was taken back by our Creator when I was four. I had sisters, but they were either off studying somewhere, or later, married. I had an only brother, but he too followed my mom. My dad was the person I was closest to but surely, that was different. Naturally, when Mr D came into my life, I appreciated him to bits.

But today, I am reminded through the hard way that nothing in this world belongs to us. It will all return to its Creator, and that is a different love altogether...