Sunday, October 07, 2007

Only to Him should we turn to...

Update! Update! Update!! I know that's what my dear friends out there are chanting. I had one person who called from Dubai and two from Malaysia, a few more from all over the globe texting me messages, asking whether I was fine and why I hadn't updated the blog. I also know now that husbands and wives are fighting over 'who gets to read the latest first'!! How can I thank you all enough?

******************
By today, my dearest darling has been in the hospital for 17 days. Such vast differences have taken place. When he went in on the 20th October, he was all bones - right up to the ribs. After 17 days, he is now almost all-skin. There's still some flesh in his arms, though not much. If you can imagine that, then you're great. This is especially for people who have known Mr D - from school /uni / work. My Kaypo Klub girlfriends used to refer him as huggable. Well, he's no longer that.

Mr D was supposed to have his radiotherapy session yesterday, but it never happened. Don't ask me why, because I have tried asking those who would probably have the answer. Obviously, only to be disappointed with "I'm not sure, wait for Dr X". Nonetheless, there MUST be an underlying cause behind it. Possibility 1: no slots for him. Possibility 2: they don't think he should undergo the therapy. Wallahu'alam... Will someone PLEASE tell me!!!

Last night, Dr S popped in to see how Mr D was catching on. She pulled me aside and asked me what the next step was. I think she wanted to be sure that I understood everything the oncologist said. I told her our decision: to try whatever he is fit to do; have radiotherapy on his back (only where it hurts), get the stent in (to widen the passage down the oesophagus so that he can eat better) and then once he regains some strength, go for chemo.

Somehow, S was trying to make me see that chemo is perhaps not a good idea, just as the oncologist thinks. Even with the stent in, it will take a long time for him to build up his strength. Remember, it's from skin to bones, and then, to a healthy body.

Mr D, however, is determined to fight this battle. He consents to the divine will but surely, he will not just lie idle, waiting for his time to be up. I am very proud of the strength in him. Yes, my Mr D has always been a fighter! He is one of the biggest risk-takers that I have ever known. That is why he is adamant to go through the chemo despite the horrifying side-effects that come with it. He insisted that I told him what S told me, so I put it as tactfully as possible, and gave him a hint of the gist. His eyes were blaring in anger, "Just put the stent in, and I'll eat my way through!"

At this moment of decision-making and conflict, I have only the Almighty to turn to. He knows what is best for us, and most importantly, what is best for him. Having said this, I pray hard that he is spared such agony and pain so that he can smile and be at ease.

Yesterday and today, I have observed a few improvements in Mr D's health, which I am very confident, is Allah's will, with aid from holy zam-zam and prayers from hundreds of friends. For instance, earlier this week, he'd be having hiccups throughout the day. Three sips of water or two spoons of yoghurt would result in 10 minutes of hiccups. And that's minus the vomits. These past few days the symptoms have reduced. With His will, this is the power of the zam-zam water, with some help from a respectable person (who happens to be my brother-in-law) to read verses of the Quran into the water.

Meanwhile, I can only sit and pray harder than ever.

8 comments:

bluewonder said...

Abgngah is asking is he on drips?
Perhaps with drips he can get nourishment and energy thru his veins.

Is a nasogastric tube being used?

BTW, dpt contact Dr J at Nuneaton?

Take care
Our regards to Mr D.

Kak Elle said...

d I can picture him visually...he is too weak to for the DXT and thats the reason I can think of and as for chemo it prob will make him worst esp the after effect...vomitting etc...

our prayers and doas still remain..

take care and a big hug from sg.

NJ said...

Dear D,

Just letting you know that I droped by here, and my prayer is still to Mr D / ur family.

Take care dear.

littlemuffins said...

D,

Air zamzam always does MAGIC and WONDERS!!. I know of a case of a big C patient recoverd from her C after for a few months been bathed with zamzam water and drank lots of it.

But of course, it's not easy to have lots of airzamzam except in its origin.

I am happy that there is some improvement in Mr. D's condition.

Hugs for you

Take care!!!

nurazzah8@yahoo.com said...

D, insyaAllah jika diizinkan Allah akak dan suami akan mengerjakan haji selepas Raya ni. IA akak dah masukkan Mr D dalam list org2 yg mohon di doakan semasa berada di sana nanti.

idham said...

D....good news ..to hear abt his continued fighting spirit..and visible improvements...all with Allah's will InsyAAllah...
We are with u and mrD from afar!

idham

ruby ahmad said...

Salam my dear dear D,

D, I have been on hiatus and only now I realised of Mr D's medical condition. You are so right, segala nya di tangan tuhan. I am a firm believer that there are miracles reserved for each and everyone of us insy.

D, there are 3 main players here. The patient, the doctors and you. The three of you play your cards right, you will insy meet with success. To start off with as I understand from your notes here, you and hubby are open with one another. Half the battle is won already insy. Being in UK, what can I say...you'd get the best team insy.

D, over and above medication, it is about spirit. His fighting spirit. Keep it perked up all the time. Talk about interesting issues with him. Talk about his favourite hobbies and aspirations. If a person has everything to fight for, the body will fight to get well.

Sorry for this wordy note D. I know it is always easier said than done, but nevertheless I want to share this with you for whatever it's worth.

My prayers for the best outcome for Mr D, you and family. Hang in there my dear.

Raudah said...

D, air zam zam bukan sahaja penawar hebat tetapi boleh mengenyangkan... Cukuplah dan lebih baik kalau Mr D hanya minum air zam zam sahaja, tu adalah treatment terbaik tanpa sebarang kesan mudharat..D sedang dan akan jadi saksi kehebatan Allah menyembuhkan penyakit tanpa perlu treatment lain, tu sebabnya banyak halangan untuk treatment yang lain-lain...*Saya bercakap berdasarkan pengalaman mengamalkan air zamzam 6 kali sehari selepas sembahyang ( termasuk tahajjud), kesannya--Subhanallah...penyakit saya sembuh satu persatu... Wallahualam...